My husband and I lived in New York City for more than a decade. It’s where we fell in love, got engaged, and built a beautiful life together. We had a thriving creative community, a friend group we adored, and endless options for food and culture.
But by our mid-30s, the city started to feel less exciting and more exhausting. Our rent had increased significantly over the years, and when our landlord raised it again in April 2024, we decided we’d had enough.
After our lease ended, we decided to temporarily move in with my mom, who lives in a small Maryland beach town about two hours from where I grew up.
We’d loved visiting her on weekends to escape the chaos of the city, and could picture ourselves living there full time, enjoying more space, morning walks by the ocean, and a calmer version of the life we had in Brooklyn.
So, when we found a newly built house nearby that had everything we wanted, we decided we were ready to buy.
We thought we were making a smart, mature decision — but less than a year later, we started to question whether we’d actually made a huge mistake.
At first, we loved our new home, but we started to regret the move once winter hit
When we closed on the house in August 2024, everything felt idyllic. We were 10 minutes from the beach, and surrounded by bustling restaurants, nonstop outdoor events, and concerts in the park.
We spent the late summer and early fall settling in. We cooked elaborate dinners in our new kitchen, hosted friends from New York on the weekends, and reveled in the slower pace of life.
Plus, we finally had room to work from home without being on top of each other, a luxury we never had in our tiny 1.5-bedroom apartment in New York.
By mid-September, though, things began to shift. My favorite taco spot told me they’d be closing soon for the season — the first of many local businesses that we learned would be shuttering or limiting their hours for the colder months.
By October, the crowds on the boardwalk started to dwindle, and when November arrived, it felt like we were the only people left in our neighborhood. Sure, there were other full-time residents, but in our experience, it seemed like they were mostly retired and kept to themselves.
We hadn’t realized how intensely seasonal the town would be. The local energy we’d fallen in love with vanished in a matter of months, and the peacefulness we once romanticized started to feel increasingly isolating.
Even though we had a beautiful house, we missed the spontaneity and buzz of city life — overhearing juicy conversations at coffee shops, stumbling into art gallery openings, booking tickets to last-minute off-Broadway shows, and the endless options for incredible food.
We’ve learned what really matters to us in a home
The truth is, it’s easy to fall in love with a beach town in the summer, but in my opinion, the offseason tells you what it’s really like to live there.
Looking back, I wish we’d rented for a year before buying. But at the time, becoming homeowners felt like the logical next step. We were getting older and wanted to build equity in a home that we owned, rather than being at the whims of a landlord.
However, we moved too fast and didn’t properly account for what mattered most to us: being part of a creative community, having walkable access to food, friends, and culture, and feeling energized by the place we lived year-round.
The summers here have been beautiful, but once interest rates drop, we plan to list the house for sale. We already have our eyes set on Philadelphia for our next move, so we can have access to the kind of vibrant, walkable communities we love.
Though this wasn’t the forever home we hoped it would be, we’re grateful for what we’ve learned about what we need and want from a place. And, next time, we’ll spend all four seasons somewhere before deciding to commit.
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