After 25 years as a successful piano teacher, my wife, Susan, decided to go back to school for a master’s degree in music theory — at 79 years old.
When I married Susan eight years ago, I knew she was a gifted teacher, one who puts in the hours needed to do her best and who genuinely cares about every student.
But then last year, Susan started to explore ways she could learn more about music and how she wanted to return home to the UK from Canada.
Almost on a lark, she applied to the oldest university in the English-speaking world: Oxford. In March, word came back that Susan had been accepted at the university that most British students dream of attending.
We couldn’t be more excited, but her 80th birthday is fast approaching, and the road ahead is not easy.
Being a student at 79 will come with challenges
Susan has always been an accomplished woman. She studied the piano from the age of 5, played cello as a teenager in the National Youth Orchestra, and became a successful animator. She put her education on hold to raise a family and went back to school in Canada in her 50s.
Now, returning to university after 25 years as a self-employed piano teacher will most likely be difficult for Susan.
As a 79-year-old, completing assignments will take longer, and she can’t pull all-nighters like younger students. She has to accept that seven or eight hours a day of school work will be the limit for her. Resting in between her lessons will be the most important thing for her.
Susan also has to manage her other commitments, such as doctor’s appointments, a daily gym workout, and stopping for a bottle of wine on some evenings.
I’m trying to hold everything else together
My job is to support Susan through this period. I will focus on cooking, cleaning, and shopping. I will also do the laundry, watch the bills, and make sure that we have paper and toner for the printer. When it comes to her schoolwork, I’ll be a sounding board, a proofreader, and an editor.
At times, when the frustration seems too much, I take the brunt of the anger and doubt.
She often asks me, “Am I too old? Do I want to work in an academic setting?” At times, she even asks, “Will I even be around long enough to finish a degree?”
Those are difficult questions to answer, but I remind her of the sheer exhilaration I see in her when doing this work. I can see it when she suddenly learns a new idea and excitedly shares it with me. I can see that Susan was born to be an academic, to do this research, and to make these discoveries.
We’re still figuring out how to afford this dream
Oxford won’t be cheap. We both have small pensions, retirement savings, and income from teaching and writing. We also know it would be foolish to throw everything into chasing this one incredible opportunity.
That’s why I’ve set up a GoFundMe to raise money to make this journey possible.
I’m confident that we’ll find a way to make it happen. I know it will be tight, and there will be struggles, but to see Susan back home in Britain and to see her fulfill her dream of studying at Oxford will fulfill my own dream of seeing Susan proud, successful, and happy.
Now, she will get to spend her 80th birthday at one of the most prestigious universities in the world.
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