This ‘as-told-to’ essay is based on a conversation with June Boyd, the great-grandmother of 14. She’s also a nonprofit professional, temporarily working as a day care provider in Toledo, Ohio. It has been edited for length and clarity.
I’m a bit of a night owl and sometimes stay up until 1 a.m. I’ve created a ritual of unfolding the sofa bed mattress where I sleep every night.
Some people think it’s a strange thing for a 90-year-old to do, especially when they hear I have a six-bedroom home. However, I’m quite comfortable.
It’s not as if I need to sleep there. It’s my choice.
I’m more than happy to let the family I live with have their own space. After all, there are 13 of us — four generations. The youngest is a 1-year-old boy. I’m the oldest, of course.
I’ve lived in the heart of Toledo for over a decade
Toledo — long considered our city’s African American neighborhood — has been home for 12 years. Before that, I had a place on the opposite side of the street.
One day, I saw some construction and asked the contractors what was going on. They were converting a single-family home into a duplex with two bedrooms downstairs and three upstairs.
Since it was only $700 to rent, the house seemed like a good option for me at 76 because I could live downstairs without having to take the stairs.
After I settled there in 2014, I spent a long time sprucing it up the way I wanted with paintings, furniture, and my other belongings. I always figured home is where you make it.
My family started moving in over the years
In the upstairs unit, the bedrooms are divided. My younger brother and sister decided to move in upstairs because I had the space. It was good to keep it in the family.
Six years ago, my grandson, a contractor, and his significant other, a stay-at-home mom, took over the other upstairs space with his family, partly to save money.
My grandson’s five kids are also living in the upstairs unit, including his 1-year-old son, his three girls (who share a room with a bunk bed and a twin bed), and his 10-year-old boy.
There’s a separate outside entrance with steps to their upstairs apartment, as well as a staircase from my dining room. I’m always respectful of the family’s privacy, so I don’t go up that often.
In 2021, things became even more of a family affair when my 69-year-old daughter moved into the downstairs apartment to be with me to pool our finances. Two years later, her 42-year-old daughter had a massive heart attack and joined us with her three children, including her baby, who was then only 6 months old.
My daughter, granddaughter, and the toddler, now 3, share the queen-size bed in one of the two downstairs bedrooms. My great-grandsons have twin beds in the other. As I said, I’m fine sleeping on the sofa bed.
The cost of living is so high
Illness has played a large part in our living situation, and we truly support each other. It shows how strong we all are.
My daughter, who typically lives downstairs with me, and my granddaughter are staying 120 miles away in Cleveland, where my granddaughter works for Amazon, and my daughter is being treated for cancer in the hospital. She is due to come home permanently in April after surgery.
In our case, there are no downsides to multigenerational living. The main thing is that it reduces the cost of living, given how high prices are. We split the $700 rent two ways.
We don’t fight. We have some disagreements from time to time, but nothing out of the ordinary. It’s not in our DNA.
Still, I’m a very strict taskmaster who demands respect. I put a lot of emphasis on this; family is probably the most important network that you can have.
Most Sundays, I make what we call a ‘Big Momma Dinner’
When we all come together, we use the occasion to discuss what’s happening in the world. My main objective is to set an example for these little children because the future is theirs.
I love to cook. My specialty is turkey — which my son, who also lives in Toledo, carves — and dressing, with collard greens and potato salad. Or I’ll make candied yams with mac and cheese. Then, for dessert, we’ll have pineapple upside-down cake. It’s a soul food dinner.
We have a table with a leaf that expands to seat six people. I’ll usually be at the head of the table. The children sit at their own little table in the dining room or, sometimes, at a TV tray in the living room. They’re in and out all the time, playing together and constantly talking.
Our situation isn’t traditional — generally, your children move out when they become adults — but it’s wonderful to have everyone under the same roof, interacting with each other. I always put a lot of stress on love, and we have a lot to go around.
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