Before my husband and I decided to move our family of four from Connecticut to Las Rozas de Madrid, a suburb northwest of the Spanish capital, we’d spent over four years in what we believed would be our forever home.
We never planned to move from our town (let alone from the US). Yet suddenly, we had three months to decide what to keep, sell, donate, bin, and store before putting our house on the market.
Rather than shipping anything or renting a storage locker in the US, we chose to start with a clean slate, vowing to purchase belongings with intention when we arrived in our apartment.
Sorting through decades’ worth of belongings felt equally freeing and overwhelming. How would I decide what to take with us in just a few suitcases and one backpack per person?
Spoiler: I did it. Now seven months into our new life, I can say it was worth it, and there are only a select few items we actually miss.
After sleeping in a European double, I dream about our king bed
In the US, my husband and I shared a king bed and had plenty of space to spread out. King beds aren’t standard in most Spanish homes, and even if we wanted one, our apartment here wouldn’t accommodate its size.
We landed on a European double, which measures 140 centimeters wide and 200 centimeters long and is roughly the equivalent of a full bed in the US. It’s significantly smaller than a standard US king, which is 193 centimeters wide and 203 centimeters long.
I’ve gotten used to sharing the smaller mattress with my husband, an All-American shot-putter who takes up significantly more space than I do, but we still miss our beloved king bed.
Having a dryer in the US made doing laundry much easier
In theory, I love hang-drying clothes. We had a clothesline at our home in the US, and I used to get so excited to put it to use during the warmer months.
Because we moved to Spain in the summer, the heat made drying clothes efficient and effortless for the first few months. Then came the start of the school year, when my two young boys, who wear uniforms and are constantly playing outside, accumulated an overwhelming amount of laundry. Washers and dryers are uncommon in Spain, so doing our loads was an adjustment.
Our apartment doesn’t have a balcony, so our combined living and dining room doubles as a drying area with two clothes racks — plus a small rack that attaches to the radiator.
Most days, it feels like the laundry takes up more space than we do.
In the colder months, clothes can take 24 hours to dry indoors, and don’t get me started on washing bedding and towels. With a family, the cycle never ends. Environmental benefits of hang-drying aside, I miss my dryer.
My expansive book collection didn’t make it with me overseas
As an English major and lifelong bookworm, letting go of my book collection was one of the hardest parts of moving.
I brought a handful of my favorites with me and stored one bin of books with my family, but the rest went to my friends and the local library.
I don’t miss the books themselves, as I know I can replace them, but I do miss the feeling of being surrounded by them and the comfort of having my choice of what to read.
My sons have talked about some of their favorite toys from the US
My sons, 10 and 7, haven’t mentioned missing much since moving to Spain — they each brought their favorite stuffed animals and a few well-loved books. However, every once in a while, they’ll mention a toy they left behind.
During our first Christmas in Spain, my 10-year-old son tearfully told me that he missed his Lego Winter Village.
Each year in the US, he’d added new pieces to it and loved the ritual of assembling and decorating it. It was about the tradition rather than the Lego toys themselves. Fortunately, we stored the pieces at his uncle’s house and plan on bringing them back with us the next time we visit the US.
My 7-year-old mentioned missing his collection of over 100 monster trucks, which he selflessly parted with before we moved. We’ve gotten him some new ones since arriving in Spain, but it seems like he barely plays with them.
These days, he’s far more interested in kicking his soccer ball at the park down the street.
Even after getting rid of so much, we’ve gained more than we lost
None of my family members talk much about missing things from before (apart from my husband’s occasional grumbles about the smaller bed). We’ve actually been surprised by how little we miss the things we once cared about so much.
I don’t miss the furniture I painstakingly searched for and curated. In fact, it seems comical now that I spent weeks searching for sideboards.
I don’t miss our cars either. Life is a little less convenient without one, and things take longer. However, I never have to deal with traffic or pay car-ownership fees. Because we live in such a well-connected area in Spain, being vehicle-free hasn’t been an issue.
I don’t miss the seasonal decorations, the toys that littered every corner of the boys’ playroom, or any of the other things we struggled to part with and wondered how we’d live without.
Seven months into our life in Spain, I love that we can pick up and go anywhere without feeling bogged down. Our stuff only held power over us when it was right in front of us. Now that it’s gone, I barely think about it.
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