On the last day of my monthlong trip to Istanbul, I sat on the floor of my best friend’s apartment, reflecting on our adventures together.
I had missed out on seeing all the top sights — the very reasons people fly across the world to visit Turkey — from the Basilica Cistern to the Grand Bazaar. Still, it was an incredible trip because I shared it with the people who matter most to me.
However, I realized I wouldn’t always have felt this way.
My need for control used to take me out of the moment while traveling
Over the years, my best friend, Chanel, my sister Christine, and I have traveled all over the world, from France and Monaco to Turkey, Brazil, and many places in between.
Unfortunately, though, I often struggled to live in the moment during our adventures.
I planned every hour of our trips, trying to cram in every tourist site, Instagram-worthy photo spot, local recommendation, and late-night adventure possible.
But the harder I tried to manufacture the “perfect” trip, the less present I became. Even though I’d been to incredible places, I wasn’t actually experiencing what they had to offer.
However, one seemingly disastrous experience in London changed everything. While I was working in the city, Chanel and Christine came to visit me for Christmas break.
We thought we would spend the holiday galavanting across the British countryside with One Direction-esque men in tow.
Instead, Chanel missed her bus from Paris, and Christine’s flight was delayed until the following day. When they finally got to me on Christmas Day, the holidays were nearly over.
Even though their travel disruptions were out of my control, I blamed myself for not planning ahead and having a more secure backup plan. They were only in town for a few days, and we hadn’t spent time together in months; I wanted everything to be perfect.
But while laughing around a makeshift dinner table filled with random foods from my understocked fridge and cheap wine, I noticed that I didn’t want to dwell on what went wrong.
Instead, I just needed to make the most of the time we had together; no planning or itineraries, just going wherever the wind took us. This was the first time it became clear to me that a trip could still be memorable — even if everything went “wrong.”
Now, though, I’ve realized many of my favorite travel memories were unplanned
As I reflect on the many trips we’ve taken together, I’ve realized that some of my favorite travel memories were the most chaotic.
For example, on a trip to Ireland, our outlet converter broke, leaving our phone batteries drained. So, we spent the night riding around Dublin on a local bus, charging our phones and gossiping the entire time.
After every little disaster we’ve faced, we’ve come together, freaked out, and then laughed until it all felt OK again. Moments like these aren’t always glamorous, but they’re unforgettable — and more importantly, real.
I realize now that what created my best travel stories wasn’t flawless itineraries or picture-perfect moments. Years later, I barely remember some of the attractions we visited.
But I remember laughing all night with my sister and best friend on a beach in Monaco after we locked ourselves out of our Airbnb.
For so long, I thought travel was about seeing as much of the world as possible. Now, I think it’s more about who you experience it with.
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